Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.
Where There’s Smoke
In recent weeks, Tesla has been targeted by vandals, who have set the company’s cars on fire and defaced dealership storefronts with messages criticizing Elon Musk, its owner.
On Wednesday’s “Daily Show,” Jordan Klepper said no one should be blowing up Teslas — “especially because if you just wait a few minutes, they’ll probably do it by themselves.”
On Fox News this week, Musk spoke with Sean Hannity and, Klepper said, “made the case for his victimhood.”
“I shouldn’t have to explain this to Elon, but it’s not about the Teslas. Teslas are actually pretty cool as a car. It’s got that all-glass thing going on, kind of like a popemobile that [expletive]. It’s got door handles that are hard to find, which is what everybody wants in a door handle. Everything in the car is electronic, so if it malfunctions, you just drown in it, you know? It’s like a free coffin. It’s cool!” — JORDAN KLEPPER
“I don’t think people, though, are mad at you because of the Teslas, Elon. If I were to hazard a guess about why they’d be mad, it might be because, in the last several weeks, you fired tens of thousands of federal workers, you made cuts to veterans’ care, lifesaving foreign aid and food banks.” — JORDAN KLEPPER
“Or, here — here’s another guess: Maybe people are mad at you because you don’t seem to know what the [expletive] you’re doing!” — JORDAN KLEPPER
“And here’s the thing: I get that people are upset. Burning a car might not be great for the environment. I don’t think that’s what they had in mind when they invented the electric car.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“Let me see if I can explain it for you: When you pull out a chain saw to celebrate firing thousands of people, they get mad.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
The Punchiest Punchlines (J.F.K. Files Edition)
“Donald Trump has released 64,000 pages of long-secret J.F.K. files, so we could finally learn who really killed J.F.K. And guess what? Turns out it was heart disease. Yep, the man loved his French fries.” — JORDAN KLEPPER
“I’m not sure we learned anything from these documents other than the names and Social Security numbers of government workers, many of whom are still alive and about to find out what it’s like to have their identities stolen.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“These files appear to support the widely held belief that Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. There’s no evidence of a second gunman, which means Ted Cruz’s father is off the hook.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
The Bits Worth Watching
Quinta Brunson, the creator and star of “Abbott Elementary,” explained why you’ll never see her on a cruise ship during Wednesday’s episode of “Everybody’s Live with John Mulaney.”
What We’re Excited About on Thursday Night
Selena Gomez and Benny Blanco will promote their new album on Thursday’s “Tonight Show.”
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